Trump Cheers Colbert’s Firing as “Ratings Justice” – But Leaked 14-Minute Roast Transcript Proves Late-Night King’s Savage Genius
President Donald Trump wasted no time celebrating the abrupt cancellation of *The Late Show with Stephen Colbert*, posting on Truth Social Friday: “I absolutely love that Co Bear got fired. His talent was even less than his ratings.” The jab came hours after CBS parent company Paramount confirmed the show’s end, citing “strategic realignment” following a $16 million settlement over Trump’s *60 Minutes* editing lawsuit. Yet a leaked transcript of Colbert’s final, unbroadcast monologue – a blistering 14-minute evisceration of Trump – has exploded online, reigniting the cancel culture war and raising explosive questions: Was Colbert silenced for political revenge?
The transcript, timestamped and verified by multiple Late Show staffers, begins with Colbert’s mock-devastated announcement: “Cancel culture has gone too far. It sunk in, uh, that they’re killing off our show. But they made one mistake. They left me alive.” What follows is a masterclass in scorched-earth satire. Colbert doesn’t just mock Trump’s rage-tweeting in a bathrobe – he weaponizes every misstep, from the *60 Minutes* lawsuit to Epstein file stonewalling, into razor-sharp punchlines. “Trump wanted a war of words,” Colbert sneers, “but he brought a crayon to a Shakespeare fight.”
**A Comedy Massacre That Broke the Internet**
The monologue’s viral spread – over 40 million views in 24 hours – has turned Trump’s victory lap into a PR nightmare. Colbert’s takedowns are relentless: Trump’s skin “falling off” on the White House lawn (“Holy Sephora sample counter”), his Iran ceasefire announcement (“Congratulations to everyone – officially, Iran starts at 6 p.m., Israel at the 12th hour”), and the Epstein saga (“The most powerful man blocking info about a cabal… boring”). Each line lands with the precision of a late-night veteran who’s spent a decade turning Trump’s chaos into comedy gold.
Colbert’s most savage burn? Comparing Trump’s feud with him to “a raccoon challenging a flamethrower to a staring contest.” He mocks Trump’s obsession with late-night hosts – “like a divorced dad stalking his ex-wife’s Instagram at 2 a.m.” – while exposing the hypocrisy of a president who once suggested injecting bleach now crying “fake news” at jokes. “Trump can’t handle satire,” Colbert declares, “because satire requires self-awareness – and his strong suit is denial. Even that’s looking threadbear.”
**The $16 Million Settlement: Payoff or Payback?**
The timing couldn’t be more suspicious. Paramount’s settlement – over Trump’s claim that *60 Minutes* deceptively edited a Kamala Harris interview – came just weeks before the cancellation. The company admitted the lawsuit was “completely without merit” but paid anyway, citing “cash needs.” Colbert’s response in the transcript is brutal: “You may take our money, but you’ll never take our dignity. You may, however, purchase it for the low price of $16 million.”
Insiders claim the settlement included an unspoken clause: neutralize Colbert. Trump’s team has long seethed over the host’s monologues, which consistently outrate Fox News in key demos. One former CBS exec told *Variety*: “This wasn’t about ratings. Stephen’s Trump material was a cultural weapon. Someone wanted it disarmed.”
**Cancel Culture or Corporate Cowardice?**
The internet is ablaze. #ColbertWasRobbed trends alongside #TrumpCensoredComedy, with fans sharing clips of Colbert’s greatest hits: the Sharpie hurricane, the forest-raking solution, the TikTok ban flip-flop. “If this is what ‘low talent’ looks like,” one viral post reads, “sign me up for unemployment.” Even conservative commentators are split – some cheer the “ratings justice,” others decry the chilling effect on free speech.
Colbert’s final words in the transcript have become a battle cry: “Trump thought he could outmatch a man whose job is making America laugh at politics’ absurdity. He should stick to losing lawsuits and mistaking satire for fake news.” The host signs off with a grin: “Colbert’s not playing chess. He’s playing 4D sarcasm on a late-night stage – while Trump’s still figuring out how the horse moves.”
As Paramount scrambles to spin the cancellation and Trump basks in schadenfreude, one truth emerges: Stephen Colbert didn’t just lose a show. He may have ignited a movement. Late-night comedy, once dismissed as liberal whining, just became the front line in the fight for unfiltered truth. And if this transcript is any indication, the war of words is far from over.
